Mike Pompeo’s NPR Interview Left a Lot to Be Considered, Seth Meyers Says

Credit…NBC

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During an interview on NPR’s “All Things Considered” last Friday, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo refused to answer the co-host Mary Louise Kelly’s questions about Ukraine. Kelly reported that once they were off the air, Pompeo accused her of blindsiding him, swore at her and asked her to point out Ukraine on a map.

“First off, why does Mike Pompeo just have unmarked maps at the ready? Is he the secretary of state or an eighth-grade social studies teacher?” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“And hey, you don’t think Americans care about Ukraine? You were on NPR — if there’s any place where people pay attention to world events, that’s it. People who can put up with the intricacies of jazz fusion can certainly handle basic geography.” — SETH MEYERS

Credit…Credit Video by Late Night With Seth Meyers

“So Pompeo refused to talk about anything besides Iran. Does he think the name of the show is ‘One Thing Considered’?” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“And if you have all this stuff you don’t want to be asked about, maybe don’t go on a show called ‘All Things Considered.’ They mean ‘all things.’ If you don’t like questions, I think Fox News has a show called ‘No Things Considered.’” — SETH MEYERS

“Hey, you think you’re going to make Mary Louise Kelly look dumb by asking her to point out a country on a map? That lady went to Cambridge and Harvard and has a master’s degree in European studies. Not only is she qualified for her job, she’s more qualified than you are for your job.” — SETH MEYERS

“Side note: Hey, don’t mess with a woman who has three first names. I learned that the night I got my [expletive] kicked by Sarah Jessica Parker.” — SETH MEYERS

“Guys, more revelations are coming out from John Bolton’s new book. Apparently, he was afraid that Trump was granting favors to the leaders of Turkey and China. I’m not saying Trump wants this book to disappear, but he just bought all the copies and threw them in Jeffrey Epstein’s prison cell.” — JIMMY FALLON

“Bolton has offered to testify in the trial, but so far, Republicans have refused to call him. That might change, thanks to reports about his new book, ‘The Room Where It Happened.’ O.K., that’s a clear reference to the hit Broadway musical ‘Hamilton,’ which means the book must be written in hip-hop. [Rapping] My name’s John Bolton and I’m here to say, it’s wrong to blackmail Ukraine this way!” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“There are now more books about Trump’s incompetence than the ‘Goosebumps’ series.” — JIMMY KIMMEL

Credit…CreditVideo by The Late Show With Stephen Colbert

“The book won’t be officially released until March 17, which, of course, is St. Patrick’s Day. So this year, when I’m drunk and throwing up, it won’t be because I’m Irish.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

“Bolton claims the leaks have nothing to do with boosting the sales of his book, but people are suspicious, especially considering the quotes leaked the same day the Amazon product page for the book went live. Oh, how cash-venient. Now we know how to get Trump’s people to tell the truth: give them a product to promote. Mick Mulvaney, come on my show, and I will play a clip from your new Disney movie, ‘Frozen Military Aid.’ [Imitating Trump to the tune of ‘Let It Go’] Quid pro quo, quid pro quo. Crimes never bothered me anyway.” — STEPHEN COLBERT

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