Trump Orders Pence to Start Picking Up Pompeo’s Laundry ~ The Vice-President has reportedly hit the ground running in his new role and is in talks with Pompeo about how he likes his shirts done. ~ The New Yorker

boro-trump-pence-laundryPhotograph by John Taggart / Bloomberg / Getty

 

In addition to his new laundry duties, Pence will be solely responsible for walking Pompeo’s dog and for what the White House described as “light housework.”

Reportedly, Pence has already hit the ground running in his new role and is in talks with Pompeo about how he likes his shirts done.

Although assigning Pompeo’s errands to Pence appears to have solved one problem, it may have created a new one, because the Vice-President will no longer be available to perform the personal errands for Trump that have been his responsibility for the past three years, such as fetching cans of Diet Coke and replenishing the Oval Office’s supply of Sharpies.

According to a White House source, those tasks could ultimately fall to Trump’s son-in-law, Jared Kushner, should he prove capable of doing them “without messing up.”

While Pence’s appointment as Pompeo’s errand boy raised eyebrows in Washington, it drew the strong support of his fellow White House coronavirus-task-force member Dr. Anthony Fauci. “Anything that takes Mike Pence away from the coronavirus response is a great thing,” Fauci said.

Andy Borowitz is a Times best-selling author and a comedian who has written for The New Yorker since 1998. He writes The Borowitz Report, a satirical column on the news.

 

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